The Frighteners

Fun fact: The Frighteners was the movie that convinced executives at Universal to offer director Peter Jackson the chance to make King Kong (2005).  Why?  I honestly do not know.  The Frighteners is not a bad movie, but it doesn't scream "give me the keys to a blockbuster remake," does it?  We're talking about a Michael J. Fox film where he neither travels through time nor is a werewolf --- hardly the sort of thing that makes you sit up and notice.  And yet, there was something about this film that gave those movie execs faith in Peter Jackson's talent.  Of course, those same bigwigs also chose to move scoot up the release date of this film from October (which makes sense for a movie about ghosts) to July (where it could get crushed by Summer blockbusters), so maybe the answer to this mystery is that Universal only hired idiots.  Or, maybe The Frighteners is an underappreciated gem, a glimpse at what a moderately successful Jackson could do, back before The Lord of the Rings made him truly famous.

The Frighteners follows Frank Bannister (Michael J. Fox), as he operates a low-rent ghost-busting business out of his (unfinished) home.  Many of the locals consider Frank a con artist, and they're right --- just not in the way they think.  Following a car accident that killed his wife, Frank gained the ability to see and speak to ghosts.  In fact, a trio of ghosts --- disco gangster Cyrus (Chi McBride), classic nerd Stuart (Jim Fyfe), and Old West veteran The Judge (John Astin) --- are his only friends, as well as his business partners.

Frank sends his ectoplasmic buddies to haunt a place, and he shows up to "exorcise" them for a fee.  Things start to get weird for Frank shortly after meeting Lucy (Trini Alvarado) and her awful husband, Ray (Peter Dobson); Ray drops dead and starts pestering Frank, so Frank starts spending time with Lucy, only to fall in love with her.  Unfortunately, there seems to be a rogue ghost that is murdering folks around town.  Even more unfortunately, the FBI believes that Frank is the killer.  Worse still, the killer likes to mark his upcoming victims with a ghostly number on their forehead...and Lucy is lucky number forty-one.

Who can possibly clear Frank's name and save Lucy and the other innocent victims-to-be?  Frank.  It's obviously Frank.  He's the only one who can talk to ghosts.  Think about it.

The special effects in The Frighteners are probably the most memorable aspect of the film.  They still look pretty good, even if the CGI is a little dated now.  It just depends on how creative Peter Jackson & co. were.  For instance, the whole killer-pressing-his-face-out-of-the-wall bit wasn't that great.

MJF realizing that they're aping A Nightmare on Elm Street 12 years too late

Unfortunately, that bit was used a lot.  On the other hand, scenes that toyed with the idea of what ghosts could do or have done to them turned out much, much better.  When I think of The Frighteners, my mind doesn't jump to the killer --- I think about when a ghost got a blast of bug spray through the face.

That sort of creativity overcomes some of the technical shortcomings of the FX in general.  Granted, they aren't all examples of great special effects, but they are probably what you will remember about the film.

I will never forget shit stain Jake Busey face

The acting in The Frighteners is pretty much all over the place.  Michael J. Fox doesn't play angsty very well, and a lot of his character's mannerisms bring Marty McFly to mind.  He's still able to make the character likable, though, even when the script doesn't do him any favors.  Trini Alvarado played a paper-thin character, and she didn't do it very well.  I get it, her role was poorly written --- that doesn't excuse her lack of range.  Of the ghosts, Chi McBride, Jim Fyfe, and John Astin probably got the most screen time, but the most entertaining one was definitely R. Lee Ermey playing a (surprise!) drill instructor.  Yes, he's done this schtick before, but he does it well.

His likes could be "Blah, blah, blah, maggot!" and I'd still smile

I was surprised to find Jake Busey in a role that I liked him; he was completely over the top, but he doesn't play "convincingly human" well, so it fit him.  Another pleasant surprise was Jeffrey Combs getting a chance at a memorable role outside of the Re-Animator series.

Above: Combs as "An asshole with an uzi" --- actual movie quote

Combs was my favorite character in the movie.  His particular brand of crazy matched the tone of the film better than anyone else in the cast.

I'm not entirely convinced this isn't Combs' actual chest

I also enjoyed Peter Dobson in his role as a self-absorbed jerk.  Like Ermey, Dobson doesn't stray far from his comfort zone, but there is no denying that he is good at what he does.  It was also nice to see horror veteran Dee Wallace in a key role.  She hams it up a bit, but I think she did well, given the lines she had.

Director and co-writer Peter Jackson made an unusual film in The Frighteners.  It's not a straight-up horror movie, but it's not funny enough to succeed as a horror-comedy hybrid, either.  The main reason for this is a dumb script.

I mean, how do they expect us to believe a dementor got from Azkaban to Australia?

Some of it can be seen in the little moments, like a flashback to Michael J. Fox's character --- an architect building his dream house --- playing basketball A) in a suit B) with bad 90s skater hair C) on a court he put in before he finished his house, because architects LOVE basketball courts and D) on what appears to be a regulation -height hoop, despite being approximately 4'6".  Other times, the stupidity comes at you in the main plot, like when MJ figures out who killed his wife thirty minutes after the audience does --- and the film treats that moment like it's a revelation.  Hell, you can argue that the entire climax at the abandoned hospital felt rushed and under-explained.  If the script was wittier or funnier, the flaws in the plot wouldn't matter so much.  But it's not and they do.  Thankfully, Jackson knows how to film entertaining action sequences and goofball moments, or else this movie would be painful to watch.  And if you were expecting the acting to save this movie from it's plot, then you aren't familiar with most of Peter Jackson's work.  The Frighteners is at its best when it is being weird and goofy, but there's just not enough of those elements to make the movie stand out.

Chi McBride's last-ditch meeting to salvage the movie: everybody gets an afro

The Frighteners is undoubtedly a flawed movie.  It's too kooky to be scary, but not funny enough to balance dozens of murders.  The central concept is a solid one and Michael J. Fox and the ghosts are likable enough, but the picture doesn't gel as a whole.  Even Danny Elfman's score feels a little scatterbrained.  Is there a good idea for a movie here?  Yes.  Does The Frighteners pull it off?  Not really, but it's not offensively bad.  It's a good try that didn't quite work.

Am I the only one who watched Michael J. Fox's erratic driving in this movie and immediately blamed it on his Parkinson's?  And then felt kind of bad?

The Howling

The Howling is on the short list for many people when it comes to best werewolf movies.  I already have The Wolf Man (1941), The Wolfman (2010) and An American Werewolf in London under my belt, so I thought I was overdue to watch The Howling. 

The story begins with plucky news reporter Karen White (Dee Wallace) going undercover for a story.  There is a rapist/murderer on the loose in her city, and Karen has managed to contact someone alleging to be the killer.  In coordination with the police, Karen agrees to meet up with the killer.  Naturally, when she comes face-to-face with him, he tries to rape and murder the plucky right out of her; while I certainly don't condone rape or murder, that reaction probably shouldn't have surprised Karen.  But it did.  The police managed to kill the killrapist, AKA Eddie The Mangler (Robert Picardo, back when he had hair), but Karen was horribly traumatized, recalling nothing of her time with Eddie, except the horror.  She tries to go back to work, but falls victim to frequent flashbacks to her brush with death.

On the advice of her therapist, Dr. Waggner (Patrick Macnee), Karen and her husband Bill (Christopher Stone), join the doctor at The Colony, his secluded countryside resort.  Here, they meet an odd assortment of folks, including a boisterous sheriff (Slim Pickens), a suicidal old man speaking jibberish (John Carradine), and a blunt nymphomaniac named Marsha (Elisabeth Brooks), among others. 

There's a bone-related nympho-Flinstones joke here, but I can't work it out.  Any ideas?

It doesn't take long for the audience to figure out that there is a connection between Eddie The Mangler and The Colony; in fact, it becomes clear rather quickly that The Colony is a resort for werewolves.

In a movie like this, the premise is always going to be the star over the acting.  To be fair, this is a pretty cool premise; where most werewolf movies focus on one character becoming a werewolf, The Howling decides to crank it up to eleven and have a large group of werewolves causing havoc.  It's like Aliens a decade early.

Peek-a-boo!

That said, the acting in The Howling is pretty okay.  Dee Wallace is a bit more of a victim than I like in my heroines, but she was fine otherwise.  Future director Dennis Dugan shows up to save the day in an adequate fashion.  I wasn't impressed by any of the werewolves, though.  Elisabeth Brooks, in particular, felt like she was channeling a 50s B-movie character.  Aside from her, the werewolves were largely interchangeable, although none of them were bad.

Like I said, though, this film was never going to be about the actors.  It is about the werewolves, which makes it odd that we don't see any werewolves until the 42-minute mark.  After that, there are wolves a-plenty, but I was surprised at how slowly The Howling began.  The werewolves look pretty good, too, when they are fully wolfed-out. 

When they are transitioning from their human form into a wolf, though, things get a little weird and crappy-looking.

The special effects do look good, but I wasn't a fan of how people morphed into wolves; they got bulgy, with what appeared to be air bubbles under the skin doing most of the work.  Sure, this was 1981, and the finished effects looked pretty great, but...ugh.  That disappointed me to the point where I found myself laughing whenever I saw the bulges start.  Werewolf sex is also kind of gross, too.  I don't know how many other films have spent time with werewolves in coitus, but I was more than a little creeped out by it.

This is her "O" face

Thankfully, director Joe Dante doesn't take this movie too seriously.  It doesn't have the comedy chops of An American Werewolf in Paris, but it lightens the mood with some decent quips and many clever in-jokes.  For instance, any time a television or nook is shown on-screen, it is referencing a movie or book (respectively) about werewolves.  There are a few cameos in the movie, too; I caught Roger Corman on my own, but I've heard that writer/director John Sayles has a bit role, too.  The cast members are also named after famous directors of classic horror flicks, which is a treat for genre fans; I will admit that I only caught the reference to The Wolf Man (1941) director, George Waggner, when I saw the character's name spelled on IMDb.  Dante was able to make great use of the special effects (even if I don't care for wolf bubbles) and he crafted an atypical werewolf movie with a pretty cool ending.

That ending doesn't prevent Dugan from directing seven Adam Sandler movies, sadly

Even though I liked the direction, the special effects, and the premise, I didn't like The Howling all that much.  It is certainly a better-than-average horror movie, but the first half just felt glacially slow to me.  When you combine that with weird werewolf sex (which was very obviously partially animated), wolf bubbles, and a script that I found clever, but not funny, you get a slight disappointment.  Granted, I may have had too high of expectations for this film, and I will definitely give it another shot later, but I'm going to say that this one is only okay.